Funniest for sale add in a while

For your amusement:



WTS 2001 640 Adventure







First off, I'm in
Musselman Lake Ontario, Canada. The GTA. If you don't know what GTA
means, it's too far for you to drive to bother.

I can’t put it
off any longer. Time to get more serious.
Word has come down from on High,
(and now the gawdam taxman...) and the deal I struck to buy a fine old
BMW has been called in. It has been mandated that my 01 640 Adventure
must go to a home with more room. Apparently, the living room in
my house counts not as “room” in this particular case… some women just
have no sense of humour.

Anyway, many of you GTA fellas have
seen it, so you know what you’re up against. For those who haven’t,
here’s the poo.

If you’re looking for a pseudo dual
sport for cruising with a brand new goretex outfit to go and talk about
how cool the Long Way Around/Down/Up Yer Own Ass was in front of the
local Tim Hortons, move along, nothing to see here, and may the fleas of
a thousand camels infest your armpits.

On the other hand, if you’re after a
proper mud boggin’, backin’ in, motorboatin’ sonofabitch dual sport for
terrifying the local pirates into screwing up their YMCA routine
midstream out front of aforementioned Tim Hortons, this might just be
your Huckleberry. (if you can scare them off during the “Y” phase, it
looks like they’re running around waving their arms in the air in panic
like little girls. Timing is the key…)

She’s got about 38k kilometers on
it, (about 22k miles) when I bought it the speedo was packed in, so it
has a Trailtech Vapor on it. More better, with engine temp reading and
tach plus other features I never use, as well as a surprisingly
inaccurate outside temp thermometer. Heated grips, and an auxillary plug
fer your heated vest or thong, I’m not here to judge. Kinda needs a new
front tire, but I would gladly procrasinatify that until late spring I
recon. The rear is a sub 1000km old Karoo, only problem is an “incident”
had the pipe rubbing on it for a bit and gooed off the knobs on the
edge of the left side. I rode it most of its so far life like that, an
am not climbing the walls in anxiety. It’s got a Pelican 1500 mounted on
the top, and it’s strongly recommended not to get too committed to
offroad shenanigans with it full of tallboy cans unless they’re packed
in tight. Really tight. Trust me.

I got fed up with the scuffed to
hell orange paint, so went with sweet, sweet conscience free bedliner.
It doesn’t matter if you lose the bike in a tree, the paint’ll take it.
And if it don’t, touch up is a spraycan away. Just for kicks, I make up
some tank decals in 3m black, so it looks like black on black decals,
but shine a light on them and they spring forth a heavenly glow. Oh, and
I'm pretty sure the paint makes it radar proof. Maybe.

Runs great, no major issues with it
except some leaky front fork seals that I haven’t hadda chance to
replace, though I have the new seals. Any mention of me retiring to the
garage results in me getting the “Look”. All married fellas with
toddlers marauding through the house know this look and can understand
why I haven’t replaced them.

Anyway, I’d be delighted if somebody
came with a coffee can and /or filthy sack full of say, $3600 or
so to take her home. I'm willing to deliver up to 38 meters from my
house. Act now, and you can have not one, but BOTH of the filthy
worn out tires seen in the pic, you just pay the shipping and handling.

So there you go. It’s a bike that’s
been ridden the way it was designed to be, no hiding that. But if you’re
ok with an honest, fast , and capable Dual, the let me know. More pics
to follow. Maybe. I dunno. Probably not.

I just thought this for sale ad struck me humorous (it made the dipshit laugh). I like the "in your face" description! Kind of the same feelings going on here: